My lifestyle is sorta weird, I'm not a spouse to an airman, I am just the girlfriend... I don't want my blog to be all military since it is my blog... but then I run across the fact that I am pretty freaking boring. I work, take care of Bru and the house and wait for my man to come home. I daydream at work about how it'll be to hold him in my arms again, and at the same time I kick butt and realize that my parents raised me right i.e. not lazy.
After so long with someone whose job is so "high speed" you start to get tired of it, I'm tired of missing my best friend and of the SAT phone cutting off. I am tired of this lifestyle. I want a home, kids, decent sized yard and a detached barn style garage for portraits.. I want the mundaneness of A coming home day after day, tired and only wanting to hang out with the dog. I want to actually have time to plan out my life more than a month or week in advance..
I am proud of A, don't get me wrong, but A isn't everything.. do you know how hard it I just want to tell people he works in an office doing adjustments or something equally boring?? Everyday. I stopped even bringing up the fact that he's in the military, when people ask I always get the same question "so has he killed anyone?" Uh.. none of your business? The second someone finds out he's military its like my accomplishments don't matter, just that I've stood by his side.. well guess what, it isn't that hard to be there for someone, it probably harder on him to be there for me, than the other way around. In the last few years I've discovered the importance of being proud, but in a quiet manner. I no longer flaunt his job, his successes or the things that truly don't matter to him, instead I talk about him as a person. He's more than a uniform and this lifestyle is just a temporary speed bump in what we really want.
Like I said, I am proud, A is my best friend and he does so much for this country by just being overseas.. without him someone else would have to be there.. and while it sucks, I would rather it be him than the guy with kids. But this "lifestyle" isn't ours, and the military can keep it...along with the rest of the crap we don't care about.