Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Testify .. kind of..

I promised to be a little more transparent on here, in general, and that's why I wanted to share this with you all.. When you go to a church, or a small group.. or meet a friend in Christ a lot of them want to know how you came to Christ, when did you go "AHA!" and then you were a Christian. 

I had many moments of "AHA!" 
When did I really begin to believe, when did my heart truly change and my life became new... Was it when I laid in bed crying, begging and pleading that my mom be okay. Was it when she told me she didn't want me.. that I was a mistake and should've been aborted.. Was it when I felt Christ moving in my heart, making me stir and reclaim Him in my life... Or has it been my whole life?

I was 15 when mom was in the ICU.
15 when she first told me I should've been aborted. 
15 when I felt like I really should be gone.. no one would miss me. 
I was 18 when I was baptized.
23 when I really started reading the Bible.
24 when I clung to God after she reconfirmed my existence being a mistake.
25 when I wasn't able to ignore the Holy Spirit in my heart. 

I've been sitting here for almost an hour trying to finish this post.. my moment was when God made me. He set me apart from the beginning and it just took me forever to find Him... I doubted Him, I doubted His creation and love, thought myself a mistake.

I was 15 when I came to Christ, but 25 when I truly understood His love for me.. 
The biggest thing I want to share is that He never left me.. He never let go and never will. 


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