chchchanges

So I let it slip earlier in February that I'd been working for Starbucks, which I dubbed "interesting" and left it at that. For me, working at Starbucks was more of an experiment in the coffee world and a way to make ends meet. A lot of people are all about it, but the further I got into that particular store the more I realized that I did not want to work for a bunch of 30-40 year olds who still think they just turned 21 and can act like children whenever they please. 

Like I said, this particular store was not my favorite.. Starbucks coffee used to be my go-to, until I had real coffee and discovered that coffee beans shouldn't taste burnt 100% of the time, plus I would rather support local businesses in the Midwest like Dun Bros, Caribou, Urban Stampede and The Coffee Co. these are all local and built in MN or ND and it's better to put your money back into the community you love.

Now I am still nannying, but for two families which will be new to me. I used to only want to work for one family at a time, but with that whole grownup rent thing I really need the additional income and kids are the bees knees to work with! Now my new job for family #2 - I'll think of a cool name later - starts tomorrow and while it might only be temporary, I hope to bring as much love, guidance and awesomeness to this family as have the S family! Plus, I get to wear leggings and leggings are 100% my go-to pants. I just want the rest of the world to agree with this and allow EVERYONE to wear leggings to work. You can dress it up, dress it down, whatever you want.. just cover your bum and it'll be good ;) 

So prayers with my new job  would be appreciated. 

-Acacia 

i see you

You, the girl who puts on a tough exterior that says "I'm going to do what I want, damned be the consequences". The one who goes out drinking because having fun sober is for the birds, and I also see the one who wakes up next to a stranger and has very little to no recollection of what actually happened the night before. 

I see that hopeful look on your face when he walks in the room, he talks about his accomplishments, his life, his dreams.. but barely remembers your name. You crawl into bed with him, hoping that this will be it.. this is the time that changes everything and he'll rescue you from the mundane that is your life.. but the next night he's talking to someone else, probably to ten other girls.. and I see that pain in your heart. 

You drink that away and throw inhibitions to the wind.. you wake up again, with someone you barely know. Your family notices, your friends notice, but you don't care.. you're young and this is what being young is all about. You sit in your room on a rainy day and think about how you got where you are and why you feel so alone. You don't realize that all of those lustful nights were you giving away small pieces of yourself and you thought it was no strings attached. 

I see you, because I've been you. 

I want you to know that you aren't alone and that this season passes, but leaves you scarred and feeling like the pieces will never fit back together. Its a really crappy time in your life and you'll be going through the motions until one day it hits you; I'm not in this alone. 

It will hit you randomly, but hard, and you'll slowly stop trying to rely on yourself and try to trust in God, but you're stubborn. You'll relapse and try and do it on your own again and at first it'll feel great, but then you'll feel weary and your heart will be heavy and when you're there He'll pick you up. 

This will go on for a long time, in fact it'll go on until you finally just say the words out loud; 

God, I cannot do this on my own. I need You.  

And that will be the moment you start healing and your life really does turn around. Your scars start to fade and the pieces are slowly sewn together. You finally realize that your life isn't about what you did, but what you'll do for Him and in His name.  

We Done Tied The Knot!

My initials used to be ARW and now they are ARR which makes me an honorary pirate, which is good because Eric sometimes asks me to call him Captain Blonde Beard and now we can pillage the northern plains being land pirates together. 

But in all seriousness, we did get married and it was about an hour ago (thank you scheduled posts) so you know before a lot of other people know.. how cool is that?! I mean, it's cool because not many friends/family read this thing, and those who do are probably saying my full name and using my old last name and going "DANGIT" so its a win. 

I'm giddy, this was a fun experience and now we can spend our first year as husband and wife doing all the things we were going to miss out on doing when planning a big wedding. It was camping, incase you were curious. 

Thank you for your love, support and all the other gooey lovely things.

*Acacia Reinhardt* 

January Goals - So Far

Hi, remember me, the girl who decided on monthly goals? 

Check in time... 

January Goals:

- Unplug during social times 

I gotta say that this has been a lot easier without Facebook on my phone. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I've made a bigger effort to be present with friends and family.. I also get annoyed at people on their phones now. 

- Workout at least 2-3 days a week

Can I skip this one?! I went to the gym maybe once.. it's the 21st and I can say that the biggest reason I haven't been working out is that I have an inconsistent schedule and an ovary that's been being a jerk. Aside from that, I have made healthier choices by trying to cut down on caffeine. 

- Read 30 days of my Savor devotional 

Shauna Niequist, you are an amazing lady! I can't tell you how thankful I am that I broke down and bought this devotional! I am spending some time with Jesus before I get ready for work, it's been amazing for me and my relationship with God. 

- Accomplish two goals I've set for photography

Done, son. I got logos, pricing, website AND I almost didn't work the entire month. I can't turn down a cute library themed engagement session. 

- Wake up early everyday 

I wake up at 06:35 everyday, I plan to wakeup at 6 next month and then eventually go to 5/515. I don't want to wake up much earlier than that because I'm sometimes not getting to bed till 10/1130 at night. Thankfully I'm not too hard on myself with this goal, things happen and with an inconsistent schedule (hopefully will be changing soon) it's been a lot harder than I thought. 

So here it is, I have 10 more days to keep at this and February is gonna bring some FUN stuff so stay tuned! 

Word Of The Year

I always feel late to the party with this trend, but I also feel like waiting, praying and being totally conscious of what I need in life is pretty important and not to rush things - yeah, I'm still okay with rushing some things, like the decision to eat tacos for dinner. 

Last year my word was Trust.
Trust God, people, life and all of the experiences I was having and to just let it go and trust that it would be okay. I'm not saying that it was all hunky dory, last year was full of challenges that I hadn't experienced and some that I'd been waiting too long to fix. What I did last year by trusting helped me realize that I don't always need to fear the future or that somethings going to go wrong. That goes against every fiber of my being. Things go wrong, life can be too good to be true and it can all come crashing down, but I was able to trust that God had me.. that Eric wasn't going to up and change his mind about me and that even the crap I was wading through was worth it.

This year started with me signing off of Facebook and just saying "nope" to constantly being connected. It has thrown a few wrenches in my way, did you know how many people rely on fb to communicate? It's kind of gross. With all of that I really started thinking about signing off completely, but rather than doing that, I'm setting my phone aside. I'm spending my phone time during nap time, breaks and after Eric has gone to work -I struggle with this one.

So is my word unplug. Not in a going off the grid way, at least not yet, but in the way that I need and want to spend more time with my family, God and in the quiet. I keep looking at kids constantly connected and I can remember when that wasn't possible.. when you hung out, under a tree, reading books or playing games. So that's what I'm gonna try and do, I'll unplug for the night and for the weekend and I'll come back with memories that don't include massive updates on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.. though I might have some of those this year.

What are your words and how do you plan to put them into action? 

We're Engaged!

So I dropped a bombshell that we got engaged, I'm sure that most of you are dying to read how/when it happened and I don't want to disappoint so here are the major details: 
It was a Monday a week before our anniversary and I had no makeup on.
Seriously. I mean, sure Eric was nervous when I got home and had texted me earlier to find out where I was, I didn't think anything of it. I figured he was hiding my gift -I snoop, get over it- and he wanted to make sure everything was hidden when I got home. 
Instead when I walked through the door I said "where were you at?" because I knew he was buying my gift, and he asked if I wanted my gift then and to help him stop being so nervous, so I said yes! I am not one to turn down gifts when offered.. so he comes out of our room with a ring box and says "I went and got this ring, and I was wondering if you'd marry me?" 

SAY WHAAAAAA! 


I was incredibly shocked! I mean for real, I asked him "seriously?!" and he said yup! I said "yes, yes, of course!" and then he put the ring on my finger. There were happy tears and smiles, maybe a trip to target, and I got to run down the hall to my best friends apartment to tell her/show her the ring! 

the wonderful engagement gift from Shay :) 

Now we didn't announce it for almost 30-ish hours because we couldn't get ahold of my dad, but thankfully everyone was very happy and are excited to come party with us in North Dakota! 
So here's to planning a wedding and becoming a Reinhardt in 2016! 

Long time, no blog!

Hello, hello! 
I should probably start out this blog with an apology, but I won't. See I stopped blogging because my heart wasn't fully invested, my time was being spent camping with Eric and his family and spending boring Friday and Saturday nights watching way to much Super Natural AKA "soups-natch" and I enjoyed not being "here" in the online world. 
A lot has happened since July, can I just say I am sorry for leaving you hanging mid summer, is that cool? Sorry! Eric and I continued on adventuring, from more long weekend camping trips to "running" 5k's, turning 27, moving to a new apartment, starting a new job (me).. oh and we got engaged too! Crazy, right? Like a week before our anniversary we decided to kick our adventuring up a notch by jumping into the world of wedding planning! I'll share more of our engagement story in another post, but for now I just want to let you know that this past year was not only fully needed, but I'll give massive praise hands to God for it. I am incredibly blessed, not only because I have my best friend and now fiancé by my side, but cause He's helped grow my business and my friendships and really everything. 
It was good to step back and spend time with my loved ones and to throw myself into work in a good way. I'm so grateful that in 2013 I chose to move here not knowing the outcome and now I plan to live here for the foreseeable future, get married and maybe have some kids! Now stay tuned for wedding stories, planning and life in general. I hope to share some photography stuff too since that's been getting crazy busy too!
See you all soon!

Wild + Free | Photography

Since getting into nannying I have had a lot more time to do sessions that are more for me and my business style and less for getting in that one or two sessions to make ends meet. About a week ago I went out to East Grand Forks with my friend Laura to do a mini-styled session with the flower head wreaths I made. This session made me incredibly excited because it turned out fantastically! I can only hope the other sessions I have planned will be just as wonderful. 

No Tribe

I remember when I was 12 and starting the 7th grade? If you're anything like me you had to go to a whole new school -holler to AZ being one of the only places that puts 7-8th in its own school- and I was nervous. The night before my first day I mapped out the bus route, both of them, and I put on the new outfit my mom bought and showed up extra early so that I wouldn't miss anything. 

I walked off the bus and into the courtyard and saw hundreds of people I didn't know and some you did. I immediately latched to my big brothers group of friends and quickly realized that these guys think I'm Keelan's dumb little sister, and I do not belong. 

I had no tribe and I would never really have one. I am a loner-extrovert, the girl who can be the center of attention but stand on the outside, never getting close to anyone. 

I found friends, don't get me wrong, and I still talk to a few of them.. but we aren't close. These people can tell you my first and last name.. possibly my birthday and that I like dinosaurs.. but they don't know the nitty gritty. I knew from a very young age that you do not let people close because people can hurt you and it's better to be lonely than hurt. 

Now that I'm in my mid twenties the ramifications of not ever having a tribe, a group of people I could count on, has hit home. Not only have I distanced myself emotionally, but physically. I don't live near anyone I know and when I want or need to talk to someone.. I have to either wait until the weekend to call my dad or try and reach out to one of my siblings. The ones I'm not close to and who I just don't feel I can bare my soul to, or ask to pray with me, they aren't that kind of people. 

So here I am, 26 and no tribe. While most of my friends are busy finishing up grad school, starting families and planning weddings I'm in this weird middle ground of not those things. 

But I want a change. I want a tribe, or a friend here, that I can call on and vice versa. I want friends who serve each other as God calls us to and who want to have lunch or coffee, not just take pictures of their kids. These are the things I look forward to most as I creep ever closer to 27 and further away from those I grew up with. So I'm trusting God with this, I'm making the efforts that I've been called to and hope to meet my BFF4LYFE (I had to) on this journey.

Half-Year

In 6 months of dating I've found someone who accepts me, pushes me to follow my dreams and cherishes me. 

I've never been with someone who, literally, can't stop looking at me or smiling. Someone who continually tells me how much they love me, I'm beautiful and a treasure to them. 

I waited, rather impatiently, for someone like Eric to come into my life and made a few mistakes along the way.. but goodness I'm so happy I decided to move here. I could've stayed in Washington, but I wouldn't have met the most amazing, intelligent and handsome man in my life. 

Thank you for shushing me and loving me as I am.

Here's to the rest of the year! 

My favorite picture of us :) 

LOVE YOU! 

This is Home

So a few of you may remember when I was on Twitter asking about places in SC that you would recommend to live in, and what other states you might consider? Well, Eric and I had talked about moving within the next 1-2 years.. but then people were getting murdered, riots and of course extreme weather issues happened. 

We talked then, and still talk now, about the pros and cons to living in North Dakota as a long term possibility. I definitely didn’t see myself staying here long term, but the more I look at the rest of the world, the more I really don’t want to leave. 

I grew up knowing the following:

-Real friends are few and far between. 

-Most people just want you to do things for them and have a one sided friendship. 

-It is better to be a loner. 

Guess whose parents were wrong?! Mine. 

Moving here was definitely an eye opener. For starters, most of the people here are genuine. Seriously! Second, I’ve never had people offer to help me with so much before. When I had to unexpectedly move out of my first apartment here, my friend of less than 5 months was eager to help me move! That’s insane, usually I have to bribe people, but here its just something people do. I’m not saying everyone is like this, but  a lot of people are. 

Now the other good things about ND? 

-Close to Eric’s family. 

-Good school system. 

-It has jobs, lots of them, and that’s awesome. 

-The Northern plains bubble, it’s a thing. 

Not so good things? 

-Cold. I was raised in AZ and the coldest place I’d been to before this was up in the mountains of AZ or OR.. which doesn’t even compare to this place. 

-Long distances from city to city. 

-The closest Ikea, “big” Sephora and Cheese Cake Factory is 4 hours away. 

Granted some of the not-so-great things are things that are sometimes seen as a good thing. Do I like long car rides? HECK YES! In fact, I like driving in general so maybe that’s not too bad.. the whole Ikea thing? It’s a treat to go to the cities and see friends which makes it that much better. 

I guess in all, what I’m trying to say is: This is home. 

This is where we will probably get married and someday, God willing, have children. 

"You Got This"

Ever meet someone who completely changes how you view.. everyone? I mean, I already met Eric and he's completely changed my view on what love is, and should be. 

Then I met his mom. 

Can we just say holy crap cause that's pretty much only thing I can think when I think of Diane. I'll be 100% honest, I had no idea that a mother could/should love as much as she loves her family. It's truly amazing. Not only has she been an amazing mom, like both her boys are enamored by this wonderful lady, but she's also made a life change that has resulted in some pretty amazing things. 

This last weekend Diane ran the Fargo 5k. This is after an amazing year long challenge to herself to lose weight and become a healthier person overall.. she did it and is a huge inspiration to myself and others. I had made a pretty sweet sign that said "You got this!" and, of course, Eric one up'd me by writing "Love you mom" on his. Such a goody-goody ;) 

Eric's dad Hans decided to surprise Diane at the Fargo 5k and as usual I had my camera with me (ps, anyone else laugh at the little girls confused face??) 

30+ years of marriage and these two are as in love as they day they said "I Do" 

These are the moments that I love and how I've figured out that the attainability of someone to love you unconditionally is real.  Way to go, Diane! 

Trust | My Word

I have such a hard time with blogging. I have so much that I want to share, but this incredible filter on myself because these words are far more searchable than the words said in private. 

This is my space, or at least I want it to be. I want this to be my refuge! The place I come when needing to share things and know that somewhere in the vastness that someone might read my thoughts. I am in no way profound, but I have things that sometimes need crave an audience. I want you all to know me, authentically. 

I need you to. 

A lot of people had started 2015 out with a word that would be their resolution.. it wasn't until March when I started to really look inside myself that I found a word -or ten- that really made me want to really put myself into: Trust. 

My trust has been broken so many times that I legitimately look for the flaws in others, the breaking points. I search them out, and I need to stop. 

I need to trust. 

Trust in God

Trust in Eric

Trust in myself 

Trust in the good of man

Trust in my abilities 

Trust

I see that this lack of trust has led me down a path that is rather lonely.. I feel as though these authentic relationships have disappeared. I've separated further and further from people who I love because I don't trust them. 

So I will make this effort to trust and live, write and be as authentic as I possibly can be. 

Motivation Wednesday

Middle of the week calls for a little motivation + inspiration. I shared a little bit of my favorite verse last week + wanted to do the same this week. I'm starting to go to the gym 3x a week and do a home work out 2x. So rather than finding a quote about sweating more, I found one about restarting again and having someone by your side. 

When I saw this quote I thought about how difficult it can be to be proud of your life and yourself. I feel like a lot of this new year has been getting myself straightened out and re-starting my life. I'm happy with where I've come from, but I want to be better. 

Then I ran across this, it reminds me of Oceans by Hillsong United which was my go-to anthem for last year. Each time I think of this verse I am overwhelmed with a sense of peace. I have a Father who is with me. Always. I have a Savior who loves me, unconditionally and that is an amazing thing to know. 

What kind of motivation do you use to keep on track and start fresh? 

Arizona | Top Golf!

This is my last Arizona installment on my blog, insert sad face, and while I am slightly happy to be done I'm going to miss inserting pictures of such a great vacation. I've determined that 6 days is not a long enough vacation and that Eric and I should probably go back to AZ when we have more time. On our last full day in Arizona Eric and I woke up pretty early to get breakfast at Kokobelli Bagel Cafe which Eric had raved about since we met, literally. But it lived up to it's hype! I had a delicious breakfast bagel and it had just the right weight, crispness and then soft insides.. mmm I kind of wish they over-nighted bagels here. After a breakfast we headed back to Eric's parents to get ready for some Top Golf! On Saturday when we were looking for a place to have lunch we went by Top Golf to see what it's all about, it was packed so we left and decided to come back Tuesday when it'd be a lot less busy. I'm glad we waited. I don't like large crowds and would rather have a relaxing time with people than having to listen/look at drunk frat and bachelor guys be idiotic.

So basically this Top Golf place is a skeeball meets golf, it's pretty fun and for someone like me who doesn't play golf at all it was pretty easy and entertaining. I swear I've come into a family full of golfers -no joke- and I am probably going to wind up playing real golf. Aside from it being a fun time, they also had fun boot drinks! I got one and so did Diane, now I have 2 boot mugs to use for random things.. like flowers or candy. 

After playing for a few hours, and Eric losing to his dad and buying us lunch, we went back for a mid-afternoon hang out before dinner with my dad. 

We couldn't complain about the 76˚ weather and a heated pool! We spent a good few hours in the pool and I took an almost nap in the sunshine..ahhh warm sunshine. It was the best way to spend our last afternoon, especially since it was 15˚ when we got back to Fargo. 

I'm going to miss sunsets like that and feeling warm and not dying from humidity. Sometimes I really, really miss living in Arizona. 

After an afternoon in the pool we were going to go to Chino Banditos with my dad, but their Chandler location had closed down, so we wound up back at the Cornish Pasty! Best part? We got our awesome waitress from Sunday night AND the pavlova that I'd originally wanted for desert. Think of the best whipped cream, not too sweet, with a firm meringue and a butt load of strawberries, grapes and kiwis. I wish we had things like that here in Grand Forks.  We wound up spending a few hours at the Pasty just talking, we discovered that both mine and Eric's dad are visitors. You know, the guys who can sit and talk to anyone forever? Yeah. 

I'm not complaining. I actually really enjoy watching my dad talk, its one of those things that I didn't realize I missed until after I moved away and wasn't around him for a long time. It's also nice to see we share so many characteristics. I was so glad that we got to spend some time together this trip. 

This is our selfie from the trip. My dad understands my selfie addiction, hooray! So this was the end of our trip. The next morning we were up incredible early to get on a plane back to the frozen tundra. I was sad to go, but happy that I could come home with the most amazing man in my life. 

And for your viewing pleasure, a sneak attack selfie in the airport at 5 something in the morning. Thanks for being apart of this consolidation of our trip. Till next time!

Arizona | The Grand Canyon Part Deux!

As I said, lots and lots of pictures to share so I decided to split them up. I will preface this post by saying the following; I am used to being behind the camera, so much that it was a very strange feeling to have people so adamant about taking my picture. They call me the queen of selfies, but to be honest.. those were some of the only pictures ever taken of me.. I don't want to sound like a narcissist, but if I hadn't selfie'd at points in my life there wouldn't be any "proof" that I'd been there. 

 

We drove around the rim of the canyon and I actually took the time to ask here and there to have my picture taken, but Eric's mom took the initiative to get some really awesome shots of myself and Eric which have made me an extremely mushy person, I love them! 

Eric's mom captured some shots of me taking pictures. I plan to use some of these as my head shots.. maybe. 

 

And I pretty much love this shot and the one below. I've never been able to be as loving toward my significant other in front of parents, but it was so nice to have Diane and Hans be totally fine with us hugging, kissing and having our own moments. I see now that Diane and I have a very similar view on photography/moments. These are the things we are left with, and I will cherish every singe one. 

Now remember when I said I didn't have an "ah-ha" moment until the end? Well see we were driving all around because Eric wanted to find this particular rock that meant a lot to him and he wanted to get a picture on said rock together. We weren't able to find it, but we found a new rock! 

It was this rock that I just sat and was really just struck with the fact that this, this is what people drive all the way here for! 

Now just some back story, my dad had told me not to go the edge of the canyon.. so I did what any child would do, I went to the edge. But the next day at dinner when I showed him this picture I told him that going to the edge is the only way to get some pretty snazzy shots. 

 

 

How can you not be taken by the beauty of the Lords creation when looking at this?! I am just humbled by being such a small creation in comparison to the entirety of the world. 

 

This would be known as an "Acacia face" because I'm well known in my family to not actually smile. 

And again, another matching picture of Eric's parents and us! I'm glad that Diane and Hans took their day to take us up to the canyon and to spend a day hiking and just enjoying each others company. I am so glad to have this family in my life. I have one more post about our trip to Arizona and I hope you stay tuned!